Batman Returns - DVD podBLAST

QUESTION: Should Batman Returns have been BLASTed?

ANSWER (Steve): No.
ANSWER (Everyone else): FUCK yes.

It had its good points - Michael Keaton as THE Batman, Michelle Pheiffer in a catsuit, Christopher Walken as Christopher Walken - but it also had Tim Burton(tm) brand sillyness, magic penguin pallbearers (spoiler... oops!), and the word "poon-tang".

Besides, though this is one of the best movies to ever suffer a BLAST, it did prompt the BLASTers to reveal their secret plans for an island utopia, as well as their questionable sexual habits.

Speed 2: Cruise Control - DVD podBLAST

It's a few years after Speed, and Annie (Sandra Bullock) has dumped super-buff Jack Traven (Keanu Reeves) for a pleasantly compact Alex Shaw (Jason Patric), who she believes to be a nice, mellow member of LAPD's "Suicide Squad".

When she totally plausibly finds out that he's actually an adrenaline freak, she gets really, believably upset. Luckily, Alex keeps cruise tickets stuffed down his pants for just such an occasion.

From here, I'm sure you can imagine: Psychotic, scorned employee (Willem Dafoe); hapless, gay cabin attendant; inappropriate sexual tension; Scottish crew.

Wait, you want SPEED!?! Oh, we got it, baby! How about an ocean liner that tops out at 20mph (32kph)!!! X-TREME!!!!!